I have never been through such a thing in my entire life! What a trip! I felt like I was visiting the valley of the shadow of death itself. It is as close as I have ever been aware I have been. A large bleeding out on my right leg happened shortly after the operation. The doctor's entered through both legs to access the heart. They believe the operation was a success. I am confident that it was. I have reminded God repeatedly in prayer that He says He holds our heart in His hands; and I cannot think of a better place for it to be.
The large bleed out Thursday evening is called a hematoba; a very large collection or pool of blood that leaked from the incision site. It got to the size of a softball, 5 x 7 inches. They worked on me for several hours to get the "blue and purple" bump to go down. The doctor said that my leg would possibly turn black and blue down to my ankle. I told him that blue is a nice color; the color of the sky or the ocean!
I have never felt such severe pain as the staff at the hospital was pressing on the blue bump with both hands, leaning on it with all of their body weight. Two nurses especially interviened when the doctor was called away. One nurse had a tatoo with a passage of Scripture on her arm that promises of God's continual presence. She and I started talking about where we attend services. The other young lady just smiled, pushed the swelling in my leg and listened.
I told both of them that God had promised me that I was going to be alright. I had Believing friends and a 90 year old minister friend who felt this way also. I reminded them both of the famous 23 Psalm where God said that He would take us through the valley of the shadow of death; not around the valley, not over the valley, or avoid the valley; but THROUGH! I thought that going through with Him has to serve some pupose we do not realize right now. But, I know God was there. I reminded them of the promise of Jesus to be with us always, even to the very end; He is there. They both tired out and gave me a pain medication and the shift for them ended. The one nurse stayed almost two hours beyond her shift to listen and talk.
The nurse who was a Believer came back and said that I have no idea of what had just taken place. The other nurse had been raised Catholic, had two small children that she hated to take to mass because it did not do anything for her anymore; so why take her children. The young lady had been asking questions of fundamentalist Believers and showing a strong interest in the things of God. I could not fathom what she was really saying. I was amazed. Is this why the internal bleeding happened? I do not know. But Rev. Cooper said something that came to mind when I got back home. He said that this operation was for God, not for me. What a strange thing to say. I am still contemplating that statement and it is a profound thought. Is one eternal soul worth the pain I went through that night? Yes, it is. I now pray that the seed that was planted fell in good soil; God said His word would not return to Him void but it would accomplish what He pleases.
Last night after getting home I went back to the emeregency room here in town thinking that I had started bleeding again. The doctor did an ultra sound and thought a blood clot may have formed. It has not and the bleeding had stopped and I went back home. I actually slept a solid 8 hours last evening. Thank God! Jane did also. The first nice rest we have had in what seems to be weeks.
Thank each and every one of you for your prayers. You will never realize what it means to have your name mentioned in the presence of God in intercession. It has profound effects.